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GETTING MY FIRST DOGS – EXPECTATIONS VS REALITY

Writer's picture: Holly DolinskiHolly Dolinski


I couldn’t wait to get a dog. When asked what I wanted most, “a dog” would have probably been my answer. I was a lot younger back then, that’s true, but inexperience was mostly why I was so happy at the prospect of getting a dog AND why I paid no consideration to what that actually INVOLVED.





 

How it all started:


A new litter of street pups was born on our street and when that happened, I knew I would be bringing at least one home. I ended up bringing 2, a girl and a boy. Yoona & Brutus. The dogs that started it all. The problem was I had no knowledge of behavior, genetics, how the environment impacts behavior, training etc.


Expectations:


Needless to say, I was expecting my time with these dogs to be wonderful, full of happy moments and devoid of conflict. I thought I was going to take them everywhere, have them be friends with every person and every dog. I thought they would want to listen to me and do the things I wanted of them. I thought I was always going to know what to do, and more than that, be right about what I was saying and doing to them.


Reality:


The reality of our situation was much more different than what I had expected. I was miserable and so were they. We didn’t understand each other at all, we were in perpetual conflict. At first I had taken them everywhere, but then, slowly but surely, I started to see they weren’t dogs that enjoyed going to certain places. They also weren’t dogs that should have been taken to other places. They were friends with a few people and a few dogs, but were mostly deeply hesitant about meeting new faces. They didn’t “listen” to anything I said and I didn’t know what to do or say to them to make things different. Turns out most of the time I had no idea how to behave with them and I wasn’t right about most of the things I thought in regards to them.


What I did about this:


At first, nothing. I had accepted our situation and at one point, I thought of rehoming them. But I couldn’t. Something in me was telling me that there can be more to our relationship that what we had. I could see that there was more to Yoona and Brutus as individuals, as well. So I got curious. And that’s the best thing I ever did for our relationship. I started reading, listening to others, learning about training and behavior. Most importantly, I started listening to my dogs. Which was great, because they sure had a lot of things to say.

I quickly learned that there was more to our life together than just the expectations I had formed prior to any knowledge on the topic of dogs. And what a life we have together now. I just had to open myself to all the possibilities that I had not yet considered.


If there’s anything you take from this, I hope it is the will to engage in curiosity and constantly seek different possibilities.


 

Have you had a similar experience with any of the animals in your life?

  • Yes

  • Kind of

  • No


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